The Soul Mate

When I had Lucas I was all by myself with a 3 week old baby. My mom came for 3 weeks, my in-laws for 2 weeks and Armando took some vacation time. Back then he did not have a paternity leave or a bonding leave.

I had a per-diem position so I took 8 months off from work to be with Lucas. I enjoyed every one of those months and cried (a lot) when it was time for me to go back to work and send him to daycare. With Matias, things are different. I now have a full-time position and could only be on leave for 3 months, however, he got to experience something Lucas did not: spend 2 months with Armando.

I feel that when you have kids your life goes by in fast forward mode. One day I was in the hospital giving birth, then I had to go back to work and leave Armando in charge and now I find myself preparing everything to send Matias to daycare and holding back my tears. 

Armando has done an excellent job these 2 last months. He kept his end of the deal: 2 months of no cooking, giving bottles, changing diapers, mid-night waking up to feed, loading and unloading the dishwasher. He has taken great care of Matias and even knows (and this makes me a bit jealous) how to put him to sleep without so much crying better than me.

Without a doubt Armando is an excellent dad to both Lucas and Matias. He was even brave enough to get on a plane with both of them! 

Now we are getting ready for a new routine, one in which both of us are going to be working and will have to organize our time to the last minute. However, we are not afraid of changes. We came to this country 7 years ago with our lives packed in 2 suitcases (like most Venezuelans) and have accomplished a great deal of things. 

Life with two kids is hard, but we are in this together. Right compañero?

The Shower Head

Alegna is the one who is usually in charge of Matias's baths. I am a very clumsy person so I'm terrified of having to handle Matias with water and soap. Lucas is easy because I can just tell him what to do without having to hold him or handle him. I am perfectly capable of giving Lucas a bath or have him shower with me. The only way I can help with Matias is if I jump on the shower and hold him while Alegna washes him with soap and shampoo.

I usually hold Matias so the water will fall from the shower into his back or stomach. But every once in a while I like to put his head under the shower. His face looks really funny when I do this. He loves it and tries to drink the water. I mistimed the amount of time I had him under the shower once and he started coughing. Now I am a little bit more careful on how long I leave him there.

Here in Florida when Alegna left I wasn't sure how we were going to handle Matias's baths. But I quickly realized I had an army of grandmothers, aunts and cousins wanting to help with every baby activity. Giving him a bath is great opportunity to bond with him. It is also less work for me, so I am saving some energy to when I get back to Massachusetts.

Tonight I went with my cousins to an Escape Room for the first time. It was really fun and we actually managed to have the quickest time ever on the room we were supposed to escape from. We are number 1 in the hall of fame!

The Stranded

I got home to an empty house. Home is not the same without Armando and the kids. I tried to keep myself busy during the afternoon. I went to a friend’s baby sprinkle, then to the grocery store, I came home, took a shower and went to a friend’s house. We talked about everything and nothing…good old chit-chatting for the soul.

Today I video-chatted with my mom for 1hr, I broke my brother’s heart when I told him I didn’t like Dona Barbara, caught up over the phone with my friend that lives in France, went to the mall and got a mani and pedi. It was a different and fun kind of day.

I was brought up by my mom, grandmother and great-grandmother and one of the things I remember the most about my childhood were the summer trips my brother and I took with my grandma and my great-grandma. We would hop in a car and drive 8 hours to visit family in Maracaibo or Valera and it was so much fun to be with people we only saw once or twice a year and it was fun to be with our grandma and skip some of the rules my mom had like not drinking soda during the week.

We want our kids to have some of the experiences we had, allow them to spend time with their great-grandparents (how lucky are they to have 3!) and grand-parents, see our family that still lives in Venezuela, meet all their uncles and cousins, but above all to have  fun, enjoy their childhood and hopefully one day go to Venezuela and see the place where their parents grew up. I know Lucas and Matias will not remember this week, but our family will and they will probably hear the stories of this week when they grow up.  

Did I have fun yesterday and today? Yes, I did. However, I feel like the Rocket Man “I miss the earth so much. I miss my wife. It is lonely out in space”.